Maximus Seventeen: Friendly Advice

Patrick and I are sitting around talking when Dustin comes over. Patrick follows me to the door and looks at Dustin, then tells me that he thinks Dustin looks sad. I'm pretty impressed with Patrick being able to tell that because Dustin is smiling. Another thing I've noticed about Patrick since he was rescued is that he's become very observant about other people, and he can accurately tell what they're feeling most of the time just by looking at them. In a way, it was something good that came from him being kidnapped. Dustin looks different, he's gotten a haircut and he's gotten rid of the stubble he's had ever since I met him.

"Hey, dude, what's up? You look so different."

"Haha, yeah, Helena thought I needed a makeover. She thought the longer hair and stubble wasn't professional or something. I kind of liked it, but I guess, you know, it's not a big deal, so I changed it. Just thought I'd swing by before work to chat with you. I haven't seen you in a month or two."

"Yeah, man. How's the new house?"

"It's pretty good. Helena had a lot of fun decorating it. We've been doing a lot of home improvement store shopping."

"You let Helena do all the decorating? It's not all frilly and girly, is it? Haha, I'm just kidding, dude."

"Yeah, I know. I figured since she wants to be a stay at home wife that she could have the house look the way she wants it to. I think she's kind of depressed though, despite all the stuff I've been doing for her. I thought she'd be happy, but I don't know what's wrong with her. I've asked her, but most times she just ignores me. I wonder if she's regretting marrying me or something."

"Aw, no dude, don't go there. The last thing you need is to doubt yourself. Helena said yes, that's what you have to remember, okay? Believe me, she didn't ever take wanting to be married lightly. She's always talked about it, even when we were teenagers. She's always wanted to be married. She'd never regret that. Just give her some time to tell you whatever it is that's bothering her."

"Thanks, Max, I knew coming over and talking to you was going to make me feel better."

"You're welcome. How is she adjusting to your work schedule?"

"Well, I made it so I wouldn't have any big out of town projects for about six months to a year so I could get settled in to my house and so I could spend time with Helena. I'm going to have to figure that out with her when the time comes. Max, do you think Helena would open up to a girl about her problems?"

"Maybe. It could be that she just misses Soleil. In fact, Soleil told me Helena called and said she'd been invited over to your guys' house to hang out today."

"See? That's what I mean, Max. I wish Helena would communicate with me. She always makes me tell her everything about what I'm doing, where I'm going, who I'm hanging out with, but then she never tells me anything when I ask her. It seems like Soleil tells you everything."

"Not to brag, but that is the truth. Soleil and I tell each other everything."

"I wish Helena could get over some of her insecurities long enough to not be scared to tell me things."

---

Never in a million years did I expect to see what I saw when I went over to Helena and Dustin's house and saw Helena. The entire time I had known her she had long hair, but now she barely had any hair on her head. It didn't look bad, but I wondered why she did it. She had always complained that she didn't feel confident in her appearance, but she never really took my advice any time I went shopping with her to pick new clothes out. Maybe her new hairstyle gave her confidence. At least I hoped it did.

"Hi Soleil. Thanks for coming over."

"You're welcome. How's married life?"

"It's good. I love being Mrs. Xavier, although I am a little saddened to get back to regular life. The honeymoon was great, and I loved Hawaii. Dustin makes plenty of money, which is great cause I can just stay at home and be a wife and mother."

"It sounds like you have everything you finally wanted, Helena."

"Well, I'm not pregnant yet, and I've been a little scared to ask Dustin about it."

"Why? Does he not like children?"

"No, that's not it, but I don't know. It's like I'm not sure that he'll be as excited as I am because of what happened with Patrick, like he might think I'll lose our child if we have one. I'm scared he'll say no because he doesn't trust me."

"Helena, if Dustin knows that you want to be a mother, I'm sure he's not just going to flat out say no to you. He loves you, he wouldn't deny something to you that was that important, you know? Have you talked to him about it?"

"No, I've actually been kind of depressed because of it. I mean, we're doing, you know, that, but it's not like we're purposely trying to have a baby."

"I think then, in that case, you need to tell Dustin about it, even if you're scared. He's your husband, he'll comfort you, and it's obvious you guys are not hard up for cash, so you can definitely afford the costs that come with having a baby. Your house is beautiful, by the way."

"Oh yeah? You think so? Thank you, Soleil."

"Yeah! You're welcome."

"How have you and Max been since my wedding? Have you given any thought to getting married yourself?"

"We've been good, and no, we're not getting married. We're happy with things the way they are."

"Really? Every time I saw someone else get married, I always felt a pang of sadness because I wasn't."

"Yes, really. Max and I are together, and that's what's important to me. What's with your hair, Helena? You've had it long ever since I've known you."

"Oh, I don't know. I thought it looked more grown up."

"Has Dustin seen it yet?"

"Yeah, we both went to get haircuts at the same time. I thought we both needed new looks since we're married now."

I don't really understand Helena, but I know the urge to change something happens to a lot of people when they make a big life decision. Personally if I had to pick a life change, I would go the route of dyeing my hair rather than cutting it all off, but I'm respecting Helena's choice. I'm not going to argue with her over something so trivial.

"Well, Helena, I better get back home. Patrick will be off school in about an hour, and Max is at work. It was good seeing you."

"Thanks, Soleil, for coming over. I know I haven't always been the best friend you deserve."

"It's okay, we're good now. Don't worry about it, honey."

---

After Soleil left, I sat on my couch for a long while thinking about what she had said. She's right, I shouldn't be scared to tell Dustin anything, he's my husband. I don't even know why I'm always so scared all the time, but I think I just don't trust anyone. I just assume they're all going to hate me, so I push them away as a defense mechanism. I need to trust that Dustin won't just leave me if I tell him things that are bothering me. The clock on my phone says it's almost five o'clock, which is when Dustin gets off work. He should be back in about thirty minutes, so I should start dinner.

As I go into the kitchen, I think about what I should make for dinner. I had gone grocery shopping the other day, and there were plenty of things to choose from. I finally decide on fettucine alfredo and am still cooking when I hear the front door open. I guess he's back early, which I adore.

"Hi, Helena!"

"Dustin! I'm in the kitchen."

When I feel Dustin's arms around me, I don't even know why I was scared of talking to him.

"Hello, Mrs. Xavier. Dinner smells wonderful, just like you."

"Aww, thank you, Mr. Xavier. How was hanging out with Max? Did you boys have fun?"

"Yes we did. He helped me work through some things. He also said you hung out with Soleil today?"

"That's right. She and I talked and made me realize that I shouldn't be shutting you out. I've just been scared of pushing you away."

"Does that mean you're ready to talk about why you've been depressed?"

"Yeah, over dinner. Does that sound okay?"

"Of course. I've been trying to figure out why you're sad, as you know, by asking you what's wrong, but you just ignored me. Max said if I just gave you space and let you come tell me when you are ready, then it might work better. You don't need to be scared, either. I love you, Helena."

"Oh Dustin, I'm sorry. I don't want to ignore you. I love you too."

"All right. What's going on?"

"I want to start actively trying to have a baby."

"That sounds good."

"Really? You're not going to fight me on it?"

"Um, no. Why would I fight you about this?"

"I don't know. I just thought you'd think me incapable of taking care of a child since I lost Patrick that day."

"No, honey. I think your jealousy needs to not be first priority, especially when there is a child around, but I never thought you were incapable."

I can't believe how lucky I am. A few years ago, I was just the awkward girl in the corner, not able to talk to any of the guys or hold a relationship for longer than two weeks, but now, I am married to a wonderful man and going to start a family with him. I finally am on the way to getting everything I've ever wanted.