Patrick Seventeen: Play Date

"Mommy, I hate you! I can't believe you made me cut my hair! Daddy told me he asked you not to do it! Why couldn't you have listened to him?!"

I sighed as Armand stormed up the stairs and ran to his room. Since the house was so large, I was only able to hear the faint sounds of his bedroom door slamming. I admit me wanting Armand to get his hair cut was to try to make friends for myself. I had gone to some of Armand's school activities, and the other moms invited me for play dates, which I had gone on, but I got some dirty looks from them for some reason. Then I heard in passing that some of the moms thought Armand looked unkempt. I really didn't want him to start his life with that kind of stigma attached to him, so I thought that the hair cut would help both he and I, but it turns out it only helped me. The mom who had said the comment about Armand, whose name was Carisa, suddenly changed her tune and I had lunch with her the other day. She was now my only friend, well, besides Ephemera, but I wanted friends other than my family members, like Patrick had Emmanuel.

I knew I was wrong to yell at Patrick for hanging out with his best friend, but I was just so mad about everything else that I took it out on him. We had made up, but I knew Patrick was going to be angry once Armand told him I hadn't listened to his advice about the haircut. I suddenly felt stupid for giving in to peer pressure, as if I was a teenager being asked to try drugs or something. Why did I have to worry so much about what others thought about me? I always tried to be the good girl, and fit in, I just wanted people to like me. Was that so wrong? Now it felt like my own son didn't like me. I felt like I did that day at the airport when Armand told Patrick he loved him, but not me. In a way, I thought I deserved it, I hadn't exactly been the best mom at the start of Armand's life, it's no wonder he wasn't close to me.

I tried to shake depressing thoughts out of my head as I mentally prepared myself to talk to Armand so we could go to Carisa's house for our play date. I knew he'd still be mad at me, but he liked to play with Mikayla, Carisa's little girl of the same age. Armand only put up with me if he could hang out with Mikayla. It had been about thirty minutes since Armand had yelled at me, so I ventured to his room to see if he would come out and be a little calmer. I braced myself as I knocked on the door. Through the glass on the door, I saw Armand sitting on his bed pouting.

"Armand? It's Mommy."

"Go away!"

"Do you want to go see Mikayla? Her mommy wants to hang out with me."

I watched as Armand got off the bed and walked over to me, opened the door, and crossed his arms over his chest, all while glaring at me.

"Mommy, you know you can't always use my friend to manipulate me, right?"

My heart instantly felt terrible knowing that Armand saw right through me at such a young age. I tried to remain strong, knowing I had brought this upon myself, but trying not to break down and withdraw again from him. I had already done enough damage. I looked down at the floor, ashamed.

"Yes, I do. Armand, I am so sorry. I shouldn't have made you cut your hair. I just really needed a grown up friend."

"Too late now, I can't glue my hair back on my head... or sew it back together."

"That's true, but it will grow back."

Armand sighed, knowing that what I had said was true. He released his defensive stance, even though I knew he was still upset with me.

"Okay, Mommy. We can go hang out with your friend. I do want to see Mikayla. She sits next to me in class and we eat lunch together."

"Thank you, Armand. You don't have to forgive me right away, but thank you for cooperating with me even though you are upset."

"Yeah... you're right, my hair will grow back. I'll go with you, but I don't forgive you yet, and I'm still telling Daddy about this!"

I nodded towards him, knowing I deserved it, and we headed downstairs together, walking to Carisa's house as she also lived by the beach just a few houses down. When we got there, I let Armand ring the doorbell and he happily waved at Mikayla when Carisa opened the door, seeing her standing by the armchair that wasn't far from the entrance. Carisa's house was large, and she had nice things, just like Patrick and I did. Her husband was an accountant and she was a paralegal, so they made good money. Something gnawed at the back of my mind as to why she didn't like me before, even though she did now. Status was probably important to her, and since Patrick was a celebrity, I didn't think that was the problem. Appearances were most likely also high on her priority list, and it must have been because she didn't want Mikayla hanging out with a boy whom she deemed unfit based on his looks.

"Hi, Katya! It's good to see you. How are you? Armand, don't you look handsome. I love your haircut! You look so grown up and sophisticated!"

"Thank you, Mrs. Drescur."

I was proud of Armand, as he smiled politely at Carisa and addressed her appropriately even though he hated his haircut. He knew how to act in public.

"Hi, Mrs. Hunt, is it okay if Armand and I go play?"

"Hello, Mikayla, yes, that's fine. You kids have fun."

"See you later, Mrs. Drescur."

"Enjoy your playtime, Armand."

Carisa smiled after Armand and Mikayla as they ran to play on the slide and jungle gym contraption she had in her backyard. Then she turned to me with one perfectly tanned hand on her hip, looking at me confidently through her dyed blonde hair. I knew it was dyed because I could see that her roots were growing back in.

"Wine, Katya?"

"Yes, please."

"I have to say, Katya, Armand's hair cut is spot on. He looks so much better now! He just reminded me too much of someone who wouldn't go far in life with the way he looked before. We've got to dress our kids for success, you know? I'm much more comfortable with Mikayla having him as a friend now. I don't want her starting out badly in life."

I smiled weakly at Carisa, trying to ignore her multiple insults about Armand. After all, she was complimenting him now, so there was no need for me to get hung up on the other things she said.

"Thank you. He really put up a fight with that haircut, but I put my foot down."

"Good for you. We can't have our children running our lives, huh? After all, we are the ones in charge until they're eighteen."

"That's true, we are the parents."

"Yeah! I really hate those parents who just let their children do whatever they want. I mean, those little guys need our guidance, they don't know any better."

After pouring the wine, Carisa sat down at the table and smiled at me, propping her foot up on my chair. I saw that she was wearing about a four inch heel. I remember wearing high heels on my honeymoon, but most of the time, I preferred flat shoes.

"Katya, what's wrong? You look kind of... I don't know, sad? Upset?"

As much as I was trying to ignore the insults she had thrown at Armand from what she just said, her words had gotten to me. However, I didn't want to anger my only friend, so I sucked it up and lied to her. I also didn't want to perhaps cost Armand his friendship with Mikayla, which was the other reason I wasn't going to tell Carisa the truth.

"This wine is really good, Carisa. I'm just stressed out, a lot of days, I don't feel like a good mother."

"Awww, honey, why do you say that?"

"Just cause Armand gets upset with me a lot. It's like no matter how I try to make things right with him, I always do something wrong."

"Ahh, that's nothing, babe. We can't be best friends with our children all the time, or we wouldn't be their parents."

"I mean, are you and Mikayla friends?"

"Yes, but when I tell her how it is, she has to listen because I'm the mother. You need a backbone, Katya. You need to not let Armand get to you. It's your job to discipline him. It's the only way he'll learn."

"Yeah, that's true. I just want him to like me so bad, though. Okay, so I had some post-partum depression after he was born, so I'm trying to make up for it, I guess."

"That's noble, Katya. I can tell you care about him just as much as I care about Mikayla. Just don't let Armand think that he can do whatever he wants. You'll be fine. Motherhood is difficult, but you'll get the hang of it eventually. Besides, you've got that handsome husband of yours to help with the child rearing."

I smiled when Carisa mentioned Patrick. She was right, I did have Patrick's support, even if we did disagree on how to deal with Armand at times. In the grand scheme of things, I shouldn't complain, Armand was very well behaved and he did well with his schoolwork. Carisa seemed like one of those helicopter parents, thinking she knew what was best for her child, disregarding what Mikayla may have wanted. I didn't agree with everything she was saying, but that's not what friendship was about, so I just listened to her talk and share her opinion with me. After a few more glasses of wine, the kids came in and we ate lunch with them, then Armand and I went on our way.

As we left the Drescur residence and walked home, I felt the wine kick into my system. I was starting to feel warm and happy.

"Armand, did you have fun with Mikayla?"

"Yes, Mommy. We played on the jungle gym and then talked."

"What do you talk about?"

"I don't know. It's a secret."

"A secret?"

"Yeah, she doesn't want her mommy to know."

"Well, you can tell me."

"No, cause you're friends with her mommy and you might tell her. I can't take that chance. I promised Mikayla."

"Honey, secrets aren't good. Secrets usually hurt people."

"Still, I promised Mikayla. I know what that means. Don't worry, she's not hurting herself or anything, it's not that kind of secret."

I sighed, knowing if I kept pushing Armand, he would get upset with me again. We walked the rest of the way in sort of a tense silence. I wished I knew what I could do to get Armand to let me into his life. Anytime he had a problem, he ran to Patrick first. Patrick was the one who knew everything about Armand, whereas I just felt like a caretaker. I packed Armand's lunches and got his schoolwork organized so he wouldn't forget his assignments when he went to school in the morning. I supposed taking care of those mundane things was progress since apparently I had done none of the nurturing activities I should have done when Armand was a baby. I was unsure how and if I would ever stop beating myself up for that lost time. We approached our house, and went inside, going our separate ways.

I went to find Patrick, seeing that he was doing the laundry, and then smiling to myself that I had a husband who would willingly do such a thing. I waited for him to finish what he was doing and then waved at him through the glass door. He smiled at me, then gave me a hug and a kiss.

"Mmmm... hello, Patrick. I love when you say hello with your tongue."

Patrick laughed, and cupped my face in his hands, looking at me lovingly.

"How was your day with Armand?"

"Rocky at first, but it got better."

"Why was it rocky? What did you do?"

I was a little annoyed that he assumed it was me who had committed the offense, but then I decided that since he had every right to think that because he knew what I had been planning to do this morning, I gave in, and pretended to pout a little, flirting with him instead.

"I took Armand to the hair salon."

Patrick sighed, and let go of me, leaning on the counter behind him.

"Ugh, Katya. Why?"

"I just wanted Carisa to like me. She's the mother of one of Armand's closest friends, and I wanted her to like Armand too, so she would allow her daughter to keep hanging out with him."

Patrick sighed again, and furrowed his eyebrows at me. I could see the disappointment in his eyes, and I instantly felt ashamed. I didn't know how to continue the conversation, and I wasn't sure if he was going to talk to me, but he did.

"What made you think Carisa's daughter was going to stop seeing Armand just because her mom says so?"

"I hung out with Carisa today and she seemed like one of those moms who hovers. Like if she told Mikayla to jump, Mikayla would say how high. I just didn't want Armand to lose a friend over such a petty thing as a haircut."

"I still think you were wrong to force him, but what's done is done. Just please, don't do that again, okay?"

I nodded, and looked at the floor, which I felt I was doing a lot lately. I was so deep in my thoughts that I didn't know Patrick had come closer to me until I felt his arms around me, holding me tightly. I looked up, and laid my head on his shoulder, placing my hand on his chest. I loved the jacket he was wearing, and how he had barely zipped it up, leaving most of his chest exposed. I traced my finger along his collarbone, enjoying the warmth of his skin on my palm.

I barely heard him whisper in my ear while hugging me.

"Where's Armand?"

"He went to go paint on his easel."

Patrick led me by the hand into the small living room. He sat on the couch, and motioned for me to come sit with him. I did and he came close to me, kissing me passionately. I unzipped his jacket and touched his muscular torso with both of my hands, unable to get enough of him. He touched my breasts through the fabric of my dress, making me feel warm between my legs. Then he rolled over on top of me, laying me flat on the couch, while continuing to roll his tongue around in my mouth.

I could feel how hard he was, but I didn't remove any of his clothing in case Armand did walk in on us. Patrick spread my legs gently and rubbed his groin on me, which was much more pleasureful than I thought it could be, considering we still had all of our clothes on. I was breathing very heavily at this point, and I heard him growl from pleasure as well. He continued kissing and pressing his body onto me until I swore I felt the same feeling of climax now that I did when we were naked and actually having sex.

I gasped and panted from the excitement, feeling my body relax now that it had found its release.

"Mmm... Patrick."

"I love you, Katya."

"I love you too."