Music Track - Play when it shows up if you want to listen. =) ~ LateKnight
I've been sitting here crying for about an hour. The bathroom tiles feel cold against my feet, and I'm leaning against the wall so hard it's making my head hurt. I feel really guilty for everything that has happened over the course of my marriage. I don't know why I couldn't just be happy. I really did want the perfect little life, the American dream, but I'm so far from it at this moment. I feel weak and defeated. I'm in the bathroom because Dustin and I got in another fight and I needed to be alone to think. This one was different though, because he said he wanted a divorce. I didn't think that Dustin would ever consider divorce, I thought he'd always be there, I had no idea he was so broken, broken enough to want out of this marriage. Robert stopped talking to me after I kissed him, so I have no prospects if I don't have Dustin. Dustin refused to engage in any romantic activity with me after that night, probably because he thought I didn't want to be with him anymore.
I don't know what to do. We went to some marriage counseling, and I thought it was going well, but Dustin didn't like that the counseling was from my church. He got upset after the first few sessions when the counselor mentioned that our marriage was suffering because we weren't letting religion be the center of it. It made perfect sense to me, but with Dustin being as nonreligious as he is, he didn't understand how it would help. He just saw it as me getting my way again while he had to compromise and he said it was tiring having to do that all the time, when I don't make any sacrifices for our marriage.
I fill the bathtub full of water and then stare at the bottle of alcohol I brought into the bathroom with me earlier. I stopped drinking after university, but tonight I felt like I needed some. I'd been suffering from insomnia after Dustin and I started sleeping in different bedrooms, so I bought some sleeping pills. I wish things could be different, but they're so broken at this point that they cannot be fixed. Dustin's words hit me like a ton of bricks. I'm done trying, Helena. You've never helped with your side of the relationship, and I'm tired of always giving it my all, while you just take from me until I'm drained. I'm not happy and I want a divorce. He hates me now, and it's my fault. I can't make it better, so this is the only way.
I'm scared, but I've always been scared of things. This is different though, I need to make it stop. I'm not worth anyone's time anyway, and I always ruin everything I touch. Slowly, I open the bottle of sleeping pills and pour all of them into my hand. I'd just bought a new bottle, and I had only taken one or two the night before, so there would be a perfect amount for what I wanted to do. I started swallowing them one by one, with the alcohol I'd brought in with me. When I had swallowed them all, I was starting to feel woozy, so I quickly drank as much alcohol as I could, afraid I would pass out before I made it into the bathtub. Luckily, I was able to climb in and slid myself down into the water. I finished off the bottle of alcohol and dropped it on the floor, feeling my eyelids get heavy and droopy as I slipped into unconsciousness, hopefully ending my time in this world forever.
The news of Helena's death was bittersweet. She wasn't a pleasant person while she was alive, and she always had a way of making everything about her by ruining other people's days, but none of us ever wanted her to take her own life. Even though she and Dustin had been fighting a lot, Helena always got up and lounged around in the kitchen early in the morning. When Dustin hadn't seen her come downstairs before he went to work, he got suspicious and found her in the bathtub with her head underwater. Her skin was drained of color, cold to the touch, and he knew she was gone.
"I admired Helena for her faith, a part of her she only shared with me because she thought that part of her made her other friends uncomfortable. She was never a very happy person, but I saw that she always wanted to be a good person. She stuck to her morals and usually she was good about not faltering. In a moment of weakness, she did fall prey to her humanly nature of sinfulness, but no one is perfect. I hope in her way, she has found peace somehow from all of the things she was plagued by in this life."
When the sermon was over and everyone said what they wanted to say, we all went out to the cemetery. We put roses on Helena's coffin and went home. We let Dustin sleep at our house that night. He was numb and quiet, which was to be expected. Patrick was quiet too, but I hoped it was just because he was sad and that he wasn't too adversely affected by the events. He went straight upstairs to his room after giving Dustin a hug. I went to sleep hugging Soleil close, counting my blessings that she was still here with me.
The next morning, Patrick and Dustin came downstairs and we all ate breakfast together. Dustin was quiet, which I expected, but Patrick was also still quiet, which I was more concerned about.
"Patrick, are you okay?"
"Uh, yeah. I guess I've just been curious about death ever since Aunt Helena's funeral. Like what makes people feel like death is the answer? What switches in someone's brain that makes them do that rather than talking things out like you and Mom do? I've been thinking about it a lot. It's fascinating."
"You're not going to try anything are you, Patrick?"
"No, I'm not wanting to do anything like that, I guess I'm curious about how the mind works when a person goes that way. I thought maybe I'd go to the library and look at some books about it."
"Patrick, honey, your hair's getting really long, do you want a haircut?"
"No, Mom, I think I'm going to leave it like this. I like it."
After breakfast, Patrick got dressed and left for the library, while Soleil and I hung out with Dustin. He was still quiet, but the look on his face was a mix of sadness and relief.
"Dustin, did you sleep well?"
"Yeah, for the first time in a long time. I feel like Helena's at peace now, since she always seemed so conflicted while she was alive. It's like now I can think clearly and remember the good times we shared because she's not up in my face screaming at me. Thank you, and Soleil too, for always helping me out when I needed it. You two are the best friends a guy could ever want."
I just wanna be alone tonight / I just wanna take a little breather / Cause lately all we do is fight / And every time it cuts me deeper
Cause something’s changed / You’ve been acting so strange / And it's taking its toll on me / It's safe to say that I’m ready to let you leave
Without you, I live it up a little more everyday / Without you, I’m seein myself so differently / I didn’t wanna believe it then / But it all worked out in the end / When I watched you walk away / Well I never thought I'd say / I’m fine / Without you
Called you up cause’ it’s been long enough / And you said that you were so much better / We have done a lot of growing up / We were never meant to be together
I just wanna be alone tonight / I just wanna take a little breather
Cause something’s changed / You’ve been acting so strange / And it's taking its toll on me / It's safe to say that I’m ready to let you leave
Without you, I live it up a little more everyday / Without you, I’m seein myself so differently / I didn’t wanna believe it then / But it all worked out in the end / When I watched you walk away / Well I never thought I'd say / I’m fine / Without you
Called you up cause’ it’s been long enough / And you said that you were so much better / We have done a lot of growing up / We were never meant to be together
I just wanna be alone tonight / I just wanna take a little breather
~ Without You - by Hinder ~
After a year had passed, I got a lead role in a movie that landed me an Oscar nomination. Soleil, Dustin, and I were all excited for the award ceremony. When we got there, we did the usual pictures outside the theater before going inside.
Patrick and Dad were going to make a night out of it while watching it on television. The ceremony was going well, and the three of us braced ourselves as my category came up. They played a clip of all the movies that had been nominated, and then they opened the envelope.
"And the Oscar goes to..."
I closed my eyes and waited. Even though it had only been a few seconds, it felt like an eternity. Soleil squeezed my hand when they said it.
"...Maximus Zenteri-Hunt!"
While walking up to the podium to accept my Oscar, I was smiling from ear to ear. Life had been good to me and receiving an award felt like the ultimate success for all of the hard work I'd put in to this career over the years. As I looked out at the audience and gave my acceptance speech, I felt like my life was complete.
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i was so not expecting you to kill her. i honestly don't think suicide is the right way to deal with your problems. i wish helena would have reached out more.
ReplyDeleteHi! Suicide is definitely not the way to deal with things, you're right. It's really cowardly, but sadly, some people resort to it when they don't want to try to deal with their problems, which of course, Helena was a prime example of someone who never dealt with her problems. She always just blamed other people and made things worse for herself.
DeleteOh Helena! I defiantly didn't see that coming...I wish that she had been able to work out her problems without resorting to suicide, but if she felt like she would be at peace, it would be hard to reason with her. She was very headstrong....
ReplyDeleteYeah, Helena was very stubborn. Even when the answer was staring her in the face, and people kept telling her how to make everything better, she just wouldn't listen. She was always very selfish and she left the world in the most selfish of ways, which was suicide.
DeleteI knew it. I called it, didn't I? Poor Helena.
ReplyDeleteSo, Patrick...wanna have babies?
You were very insightful indeed. =) LOL, Patrick is a hottie, just like his papa.
DeleteFirst things first- CONGRATS MAX! :D
ReplyDeleteI really have a hard time deciding if I fell more angry or sad reading this: " Robert stopped talking to me after I kissed him, so I have no prospects if I don't have Dustin. Dustin refused to engage in any romantic activity with me after that night, probably because he thought I didn't want to be with him anymore" No other prospects and could not wring a child out of Dustin, so I go kill myself? Wow. 100% Helena up to the very end...
Ok, I decided on sad AND angry. And I am pretty relieved that Dustin took that blow relatively well, it would have been so ironic if he had now blamed himself for all that happened. Nice thing that her church allowed for her to have a ceremony there, too, this bit really surprised me most!
Btw, am I the only one who considers Pat's reaction a bit... strange?
Max: Thank you very much. =D
DeleteThat's good that you're feeling things after reading my stuff. I feel good because at least my story doesn't bore you. =) Helena. You know Helena. She's crazy and stubborn and selfish. Of course she would kill herself when she doesn't get her own way instead of oh, being like a normal person, and just changing things about herself.
Ha, right? Dustin is not easily guilted into anything, including his wife's death. He knew she brought it all upon herself. He tried hard, for many years, and she just never learned. Her church was one of the nicer ones, and she was a member up until her death, so they were completely fine having the funeral there.
Well, when the author is a bit strange, you can expect my characters to have strange reactions to things, right? XD
I wanted Helena's death to affect Patrick in a different way. I'm hoping to have him being curious about death and the mind's peculiar ways tie into things he does later on in his life.
Thanks for reading and commenting, anna. =D
Dustin may not have liked counselling from the church but did he ever suggest marrige counselling outside the church?
ReplyDeleteHe should of seen she was so low. I do feel sorry for Helena, in that she felt she had to do this. The ending was very bittersweet
Hi Lckygrl! I probably should have mentioned this when I wrote it since people can't see in my head and read my mind. LOL. Oops. XD In my mind, Dustin was the one who suggested counseling, and Helena refused to do it unless it was through her church counselor. So yes, he did suggest it, I forgot to write it that way. Helena's sad, low behavior was pretty common throughout her life, and she hid it the most from Dustin. When she got sad, she would just yell at Dustin about something stupid to pick a fight with him instead of telling him how sad she was. Over time, Dustin got tired of her yelling at him. He and her grew apart, so he didn't really pay as much attention to her as he maybe should have.
DeleteBittersweet is what I was going for, so yay, I'm glad it came across that way to you.
Thanks so much for reading and commenting. =D
Ding Dong! The Witch is dead! Which old Witch? The Wicked Witch! Ding Dong, the wit-
ReplyDelete*clears throat and stops dancing*
Ahem, sorry.. Got a little.. Over excited there.
Anyways. XD
Poor Helena. Well, no, not really. I hated her. Yeah yeah, suicide is not the answer and all that, but man am I glad to see her out of the picture and Dustin beginning to feel some peace and happiness. When I read the first paragraph where Helena is thinking "I had no idea he was so broken, broken enough to want out of this marriage", I laughed a little, because it's just so funny that everyone in the entire world can see that Dustin was getting to the point where it was too much, except Helena. She's still as dense as ever even in her last hour of living. *rolls eyes* XD
Yay Max! Congrats :D *tackle hugs*
Oh Patrick.. You have an immense amount of flirting from me coming your way when your gen starts. ;)
Great Finale :D
ROFL! Don't worry, I was excited to write this chapter, for two reasons, one of them being I could end Helena. XD
DeleteUgh every time I wrote for Helena, I was always like, wait that makes no sense, and then I was like okay, if it makes no sense to me, then it totally makes sense to Helena, so I'm good. LOL. With how stupid she was, I didn't really see her being capable of having an epiphany, even with the drastic measures she was taking. XD
Max: Thank you so much.
LOL. Patrick. Mmmm.... I have this idea of what I want Patrick's appearance to be when he grows up... I'm probably going to faint. XD
Thanks so much for reading and commenting, darling! =)
This chapter is bittersweet. On one hand Helena's death is sad, but Max winning the Oscar is great.
ReplyDeleteHopefully Dustin is able to pull through and find someone else who will love him. It would be a shame if Dustin's good character and genes didn't get passed on.
And I can't wait to see what is in store for Patrick since you mentioned this is the last chapter that focuses on Max's story.
Bittersweet is what I was going for, so yay, I'm glad it got across to you that way. =) That song, the little conversation with Max and Soleil, and Dustin being at the Oscars was to show that he got along just fine. In a way, Helena not being in his life anymore was better for him, she was more destructive to him than helpful.
DeleteI have an idea of how I want Patrick to look when he gets to YA, but I'm still trying to figure out how I want to start his generation. =)
Thanks for reading and commenting. =D
WOW!!! Well I never saw that one coming!! I never would have expected it of Helena - being so religious isn't suiside supposed to be a sin?? Im sat here in shock - not sure how I feel about it.
ReplyDeleteI thought it quite funny that I was listening to that hinder song just before I started reading this - then it pops up again. And it does fit in perfectly with the chapter!!
Patrick is getting cuter and cuter!! Can't wait to see what you do with him!
Yes, suicide is a sin in the eyes of religion. Helena is... complicated. She wanted to be self-righteous, and she often missed the point of the religion she claimed to believe in so much. Just as she believed more in the idea of marriage, she also believed more in the idea of religion, as in people should have it because it's good. Actually applying things that the religion teaches or putting effort into her marriage, was something that she never grasped.
DeleteLOL, that's funny about the Hinder song. I heard it one day and it completely inspired me to end Helena's story line this way, as controversial as it may be.
I have some idea of how I want Patrick to look as a YA, but I'm still trying to figure out exactly how to start off his generation. =) I'm glad you're excited for it.
Thanks for reading and commenting. =D
o.o
ReplyDeleteDude. I had to read that twice... In a way I can't believe Helena did that - because she's religious. But, in a way, it really makes sense. There's the curse after all... well... Helena could never imagine that it was her that was wrong (right until the end it was St. Dustin she thought was broken), so she couldn't imagine trying to change herself. So, when she came to the realization that it was in fact her that was the problem there were no options left that she could see...
It makes me sad though... I mean - they say you should be able to be yourself and people should like you for who you are - but a part of growing up is actually growing up - and that means changing and learning to empathize and to grasp deeper meaning from things... Helena, I feel, never grew up... And, oddly that's the part I feel bad about. I feel guilty that I'm glad she's gone, for St. Dustin's sake, but I don't feel bad about her being gone. I feel bad that she never actually reached her potential in any way, and she gave up rather than trying to figure out how to reach it...
Very good chapter :)
I feel like Patrick's reaction came way out of left field, but that's one of my favorite things about your writing, it's not typical. :) I can't wait to see what that all means for Patrick - what kinda guy he's going to be.
I love that song btw, though I'd never seen the music video before. It kinda made me laugh. "Forget boys - stay in school!" lol
DeleteThank you, I am glad you liked it. To be honest, I have had family members who I was not close to pass away, and I can say I didn't feel anything when they died. That's probably not normal, but I never claim to be normal. LOL. I have an idea of what I want Patrick to look like and an idea of his personality, so his reaction here was me trying to give myself a lead into that.
DeleteI was inspired for this generation by my favorite quote from Batman Begins which basically says that who you are as a person is based on what you do with your life, not just what you say you are. You can claim to be religious, but not act religious, like Helena, with her kissing Robert, and committing suicide. Robert was religious, and he acted that way by refusing to carry on with a married woman. Helena was the type of person who always thought she was right, even when she was really wrong, so admitting she needed to change was just not even something she could fathom.
I'm glad that this chapter gave you mixed feelings, I was aiming for deeply bittersweet when I wrote it. When I heard that Hinder song one day, I thought it'd be perfect for how Dustin felt after Helena's death. Dustin was sad of course, his wife died, but he also felt a sense of relief, as he said he felt she was at peace now, so it's okay. Dustin was in the end too when I showed them at the Oscars because I wanted to portray that Dustin was going about life as normal and that he's okay.
Thanks so much for reading and commenting Mandy! =D
oh woe is me, Helena's moto. She loved to be the victim, and ended it as a victim.
ReplyDeleteGreat work writing her character because she really ticked me off bad. *L*
Dustin has a second chance at Life. Good for him (aren't I cold?) .... Patrick seems like he will be a scientist :)
Thank you for the compliments. I loved this chapter especially because I finally got to get rid of Helena. It made me so mad every time I had to write her point of view. LOL. Yay, Dustin is free! I won't give away the career I chose to give Patrick, but I will say it's not scientist. He is super smart and curious though, so I can see why you thought that. =) I'm hoping to post Patrick's first chapter tonight, or at the very latest, tomorrow, so you'll find out soon enough. Thanks so much for reading and for all the comments. =)
DeleteHow sad for Helena. I wish I could say I was surprised but that would be a lie. She was a very well written character! Bravo!
ReplyDeleteMaximus, tux, Oscar. . .I'm sorry, I've forgotten what I was going to type. Lol! Glad he and Soliel are still doing well. I'm interested to see what happens with Patrick.
I'm with Zhippidy, I'm glad Dustin is free.
Hi! =) Well thank you for the compliments. LOL. Maximus is so hot in that tux... XD Yeah, it was my ultimate plan to have him and Soleil love each other forever. Awww, hahha. Patrick is a mysterious person, that's for sure. =) Dustin is also happy to be free.
DeleteThanks for reading and commenting, Sandybeachgirl! =)
Wow...I don't know what to think of Helena dying. It is tragic, although her life in general was so tragic. The worst part about her life wasn't that she was lacking in the big things in life like family, friends, a loving husband, security, but that she wasn't able to recognize how fortunate she was to have them. On another note, Patrick seems to have quite an inquisitive mind...I wonder if he would well suited for an intellectual career.
ReplyDeleteSoleil's dress looks gorgeous! It looks a lot like the dress Nicole Kidman wore (not sure how I remember these things :P). I'm so glad that Max won the Oscar! It was a nice way to end the generation. :)
Tragic is probably the best word for it. In Helena's mind she didn't have any other options, which is so sad considering she had everything that some people would kill for.
DeletePatrick is very intelligent, inheriting that from Max. I picked a career for him where he gets to use his intellect, but it might not seem typical. =)
Aww thanks! Soleil's dress is actually a Sims version of Nicole's dress! =) That's so cool that you knew that. I wanted Max's generation to end on a happy note because he's such a good guy.
Wow, This blog is amazing.. I started reading Maxs story an hour ago and i couldn't stop until i was finished! I can't wait to start reading about the next generation!
ReplyDeleteThank you for the kind words! I'm working on a second chapter for Patrick's generation, but I've been having RL stuff take up a lot of my time lately, so I don't know when I'll be able to post it.
DeleteWoah, just woah. I can't believe Helena offed herself. That was actually kind of sad to read. :( You write so wonderfully to drudge up that kind of emotion in me. Freakin awesome chapter even though it was sad.
ReplyDeleteXD Thanks for the compliments.
DeleteHelena fell prey to the demons inside her. She just couldn't deal with life even though the answers were staring her in the face. In her twisted mind, suicide was the only way she would be happy.
I'm not sure what to say. I am so glad she's gone because she ticked me off to no end, but I also am always sad when someone feels the need to end their own life. Like, I don't even know how they could get that far. However, her thoughts were very destructive to herself, so I guess that's how. :( I'm not sure what else to say.
ReplyDeleteThis is bittersweet. I've been to a suicidal point in my life before, but always found the will to live again. It's the point in life that not everyone experiences, but I can best describe it as I was so numb inside that I wanted, needed to do something, anything to make myself feel something even if it was only pain. It's an empty feeling, which I would never wish on anyone. It's terrible, and horrible, and it makes people think death is better than the emptiness. So I understand Helena's feelings of hopelessness. She refused to change, refused to let people help her, and she made herself believe that there was nothing left to do or live for. Her low self esteem has always eaten her alive from the inside, and she believed wholeheartedly that no one would miss her.
DeleteI feel really sad that Helena could find no other way out. She must have felt so lonely, even though most of it was her fault. I'm annoyed that Dustin didn't force her to try therapy/rehab as I think it would have helped a lot. It was her choice in the end though ... Hopefully, Dustin will find happiness again.
ReplyDeletePatrick is a lot more serious than both of his parents. I'm really intrigued as to how his story is going to turn out. I LOVE his long hair btw :)
Yes, Helena was lonely, despite everyone around her. She was somehow trapped in her own mind all the time. Well, heh, that's actually my fault of not mentioning it in the chapter. This particular instance, I think I forgot that people can't see into my head, LOL. Okay to clear things up, so when I mentioned that Dustin got mad cause Helena would only go to church counseling, I was thinking that Dustin had agreed to go to counseling, and he had suggested regular marital counseling, but Helena refused because she only wanted church counseling. Naturally it didn't work. LOL. Dustin's story is for the most part over now after this chapter, since generation two starts next chapter, but he is happy, probably a lot happier since he's got the good memories of Helena in his mind.
DeleteHaha, yeah, Patrick is very serious, keeping to himself a lot, mysterious, while Max and Soleil were more outgoing. Aww thanks, LOL, I enjoyed that haircut, and it looks very fitting on Patrick. :D I hope you enjoy Generation 2, heehee, I see that you've read some of it already. It's getting late here, so I'm going to answer the rest of your comments later. :)
Thanks so much for reading! :)
Wow I can't believe she did that :( suicide is never the answer! She's religious too...But that's between her and her God. I don't know what bible she was reading...but either way she made a poor choice and Dustin had to find her like that. You know this is actually a really good ending...I feel conflicted lol I'm happy for Max and Soleil but I'm upset about Helena and I never really liked her but I'm sad she's gone. Patrick's reaction was mysterious, I love how he's fascinated with it...that's how I am about tragic things...I think everyone thinks about death at some point in their life...it's the greatest mystery known to man kind. Patrick might become a scientist of some sort or maybe a detective...He also kind of looks like the guy in the music video :) I like his long hair. What an ending...no baby and no Helena lol
ReplyDeleteYeah, :( suicide is the perfect way of telling the world "I give up." LOL, the example of Helena being religious is that she was only religious on the surface, like she thought it would be good for her, but when it comes to actually following God's word, she failed. Sadly, a lot of religious people I've run into are like her, they rain judgment on other people using the Bible as their tool, but then they are some of the worst people in the world. Helena believed in the idea of religion, but she didn't completely understand what religion was supposed to be, hence the contradiction. She never practiced what she preached. XD It was tragic for Dustin to find her, especially since he had tried so hard with her, it was almost as if she was hurting Dustin one last time with her final act, saying that she didn't appreciate anything he did to try to save the marriage. It's another twisted way of Helena's religious beliefs too because she didn't believe divorce should ever happen, but then she still contradicted religion by committing suicide.
DeleteThanks so much, I was going for bittersweet for my endings, some things good, some things bad, but always something to learn and think about. :D It is always sad when someone dies, even if they were a jerk. LOL because I don't think anyone deserves to die early in their life.
Patrick's reaction ties into the career he picks when he grows up. :D
Death is an interesting topic, scary, but fascinating at the same time. It intrigues me, and the psychology behind suicide is very interesting. I like your guesses about Patrick's future career, you'll have to read on to see if you were right on either count. ;) Haha, thanks! I saw that hair when I was downloading some CC and I felt it would be perfect for him.
Helena was a great character -- and I'm repeating that, I know. She carried this story, instead of the protagonist that should have been Max. And when she dies, the story ends. Because we would be left with Max and Soleil's uneventful life.
ReplyDeleteMy feeling is that Dustin gave up on her. Complaining about church counseling, ok? But not suggesting anything else? I thought they were not even living in the same house anymore. I would have liked him to feel a bit more guilty or desperate, even though he tried to be a good man and husband most of the time -- and yes, he was a hero for marrying Helena. I never thought, in the early stages of this story, that she would find a partner -- and I'm glad she did, because that's when her character took center of the stage.
I'm sorry if I often read this story as a fellow writer, and not simply as a reader, and comment like that, too. But that's also what I always appreciated in your comments on my story -- you were reading between the lines.
It was very entertaining, and I have immensely enjoyed reading about Helena and the confusion she spread around her. Now it's time to go back to my won story for a while -- I'm stuck exactly at the point where one of the characters had attempted suicide.
Thank you so much for writing and sharing this story with us!!
Aww thanks. Helena appreciated your constant support and love for her. LOL. Sometimes I wish I had written this generation differently, with more focus on Max, since he was the heir, but this was my first attempt at legacy writing, so forgive me for maybe making it a little Helena-heavy instead of Max-heavy.
DeleteSo, when I said in Helena's POV that Dustin didn't want to do church counseling, I should have written that Helena also refused to do secular counseling, so they were both refusing to do counseling with each other. I did not intend to villainize Dustin, but I forget that people are not in my head when I write, and it was a detail that I didn't put in, but should have. So that's to clear up the confusion with that.
Dustin was at the end of his rope because Helena wore him down. He had a lot of patience, but he's not perfect, because he's human, and his patience was over. He was just done with her, that's why he didn't feel too guilty and definitely not desperate over her death. It might seem cold, but considering all the bullshit Helena put Dustin through, it was like he was being released from a very hard terrible situation that had no hope.
I accept your apology, and offer one of my own, LOL, if any of my replies seemed harsh, I never wanted to make you feel like your comments weren't appreciated. I am sorry. :) Also I would like to let you know I love your comments, and I am very happy you are one of my regular readers. I'd like to mention too that I hope when I comment on your story, I don't make you feel like I'm attacking you as an author, I never intend that. I strongly feel that the author should write the story however they want, even if it causes the reader some emotional distress because in the end, the author is the king or queen of their story.
Oh wow, that's a coincidence then, that this chapter ended in suicide, and you happen to be at a place with an attempted suicide in your story. :D
I think I will stop by yours and catch up. I've been behind for a while.
I hope to see you again soon for generation two of Echoes. Thanks so much for taking the time to leave me all these thoughtful comments, and I'm glad you have enjoyed reading. :)
Less than a week after I finished reading it, I MISS HELENA. :´(
DeleteShe is this memorable, to me. I remember her face and her gaze better than anyone else's in the story. I might read it again, just her parts, to see how she evolved. Contrary to you, I was so glad this story was 'Helena-heavy' instead of 'Max-heavy'. ;)
I wish I could have saved her.
Thanks for writing and replying.
Cheers!
Aww, AndanteZen. XD I am certainly very pleased to hear that one of my characters was so dear to your heart. No matter which character it was, it still makes me happy to hear that I was able to write something that touched you so much. :)
DeleteYou make my story sound so final, LOL, even though there's an entire second generation that I have finished. XD I understand if you need some time to miss Helena, mourn her, even, LOL. Certainly feel free to read the parts about her over again, it will give me time to add more to future generations. LOL. I hope that you find another character that you enjoy just as much as you enjoyed Helena.
See you again soon on your story. :D
I'm sorry that Helena felt that death was the only option left to her. It's kind of sad. I was not expecting that to be her decision, though. You know, with her being so religious and all. I hope that Dustin is able to move on from here and find someone that will love and appreciate him and make him feel like he matters. Although Helena said she loved him, she had a funny way of showing it.
ReplyDeletePatrick is such a little smarty. I'm so fascinated with his curiosity. Sooo excited for his generation to start and see where life takes him!! *squeals* haha
And YAY!! Way to go Max! So happy that he had such a successful and fulfilling life, both in love and career-wise. Great end to this first generation! XD
Suicide is always sad, and the fact that she was religious, yet still did it, was to show that her hypocrisy stayed with her, even up to the time of her death. Helena never practiced what she preached, as she was more in love with the idea of religion, just like she was in love with the idea of being married, but when it came down to her actually needing to make a marriage work, or sticking to things her religion teaches, she fails miserably. She liked to lord her beliefs over others, but she was very bad at following them herself. Sadly way too many religious people are like this. I think in Helena's heart, she wanted to love Dustin, and she may have convinced herself she did, but she did very poorly at translating that feeling into action.
DeleteSince Dustin wasn't the heir in Echoes, we will not be seeing any more of him, but I will say that in my mind, I imagine him meeting a wonderful girl who is also in the movie business, and he got his happy ending. :D A year after Helena's death, Dustin hasn't fallen apart or anything, so that was my way of kind of showing he's okay, and will continue to be.
LOL, Patrick is very intellectual, and his perceptiveness feeds his curiosity. He gets his intellect from Max. XD
Thank you for acknowledging Max too, when I reread this, the chapter sometimes can feel like Helena's death was the focus of it, but Max got his happy ending! :)
Is it bad that I'm not all that sad over Helena's death? Suicide isn't the answer, but the other problems she had were self inflicted. There was a hole in her that could never be filled. I think she had the most extreme case of daddy issues ever. Honestly that was the one thing she could never make peace with and because of that the rest of her life spiraled out of control and she made life hard on everyone.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad Max's life hit that high point. Winning an Oscar is top prize and I'm glad all his hard work paid off in the end. He led a full life surrounding by people he loved and has a great life to lead.
yay gen. 1 done. :)
Nope, it's not bad, at all, I wasn't very sad either when I killed her off. LOL. She took the only way out she knew, which was to end it. Since she absolutely refused to get help, listen to anyone, open her eyes, it was inevitable that she withdrew into herself, and eventually took her own life. The hole in her could have been fixed if she would have wanted to change. I'm sure her daddy issues were a huge part of her deal, but the thing that was more of a problem for her is that she didn't want to admit that she had a problem, and it ate her alive. She let the religious part of herself judge everyone around her, and she insisted on projecting her own problems to other people.
DeleteMax worked his ass off, and he got success for it. He'll be in many more movies to come, LOL, and he'll be showing up in future generations cause he's still fairly young.
Thank you for reading and commenting! Haha, nice job getting through generation 1 so quickly. XD
Oh man. What a chapter.
ReplyDeleteAs much as I am not Helena's # 1 fan, I still felt a bit sad about her death. Suicide is never the answer.
All that self-inflicted pain could have been helped if she listened to the people around her. If she had, of course, she wouldn't be Helena.
On a happy note, a big congrats for Max!
I just started reading your stuff today and will work on the rest of it, and probably finish it since I tend to speed read. xD
Hi carlimact! Welcome to Echoes!
DeleteLOL yeah, suicide doesn't help anyone in the big picture. In Helena's mind, it made perfect sense because she felt so alone. She did inflict all her damage onto herself, and yes, exactly, if she had wanted help and wanted to change, that wouldn't have been Helena. ROFL.
Yay! Max appreciates it!
Heeehee... I hope you enjoy your stay. :) Thank you so much for checking out my story.
How ironic that a person who preaches about morals in everyone else's life commits a sin to end her own. Suicide is a sin and yet Helena committed it without any second thoughts. I feel sad and her end shouldn't surprise be because everything she did in life always led to self destruction. I just wish she would have asked for help and maybe all of that could have been avoided.
ReplyDeleteNow that I got the bad stuff out of the way congrats to Max on winning the award. I know they had a bit of concern for Patrick when he asked questions but he is looking for books to find an answer is he going to study psychology maybe?
Haha yes, irony was what I was going for with Helena. Her whole life was ironic and hypocritical. She claimed to preach religion and morality, but never in her life did she practice any of it. She went around causing trouble for everyone around her, showing no one any love, which is what her religion was about, love, but she missed the mark entirely. Sadly there are one two many religious people like Helena, and I actually based her character off a religious person I used to know. Her ultimate demise by suicide was also one of the glaring hypocritical things that I wanted to show coming from her life because yeah, it is a sin. Helena didn't practice her religion at all during her life, so why the hell would she start now? LOL, well, you know, she was very self-righteous, thinking God would fix everything without realizing that she needed to also do things to help herself. God's not just going to plop some magic solution in her lap, that's not how it works.
DeleteWoop! Max got one of the highest awards a person can get in the film industry and Soleil and Dustin were very proud of him. Patrick is looking for the answer in books, so his parents have nothing to worry about. ^_^